Feb. 26-"Solitude must be woven into our daily life, it produces reverence. Reverence is that altered state of consciousness when you feel awe and wonder. Reverence enwraps you in perfect peace because there is no past/future, only the present moment. Today try concentrating on one task at a time w/care and attentiveness, it will evoke reverence. Real life full of joy begins when we restore a sense of reverence to our daily affairs. Today, search for the sacred in the ordinary of your life-you will find gratitude in your heart."
Feb. 27-"If you consciously work to bring more gratitude, simplicity, order, harmony, beauty, and joy into your daily life, your world will be transformed. The spiritual, creative and practical can't be seperated-they are connected. You think you are only making a meatloaf, you're really ministering to hungry bodies and weary souls in need of nourishment and love. Spirituality is the sacred center of which all life comes...including Monday, Tuesdays and rainy Saturdays in all their mundane yet glorious details."
Feb. 28-"Create a sacred space to celebrate, concentrate and consecrate your inner work. Start gathering meaningful objects that evoke love and gratitude to you. These things will encourage you to meditate more often. The objects should represent all that you love and you are grateful for."
As I was quoting some of these thoughts, I was reminded that though one can never be sure where an author's "thought" truly comes from, you can know what thoughts an author provokes in you. In thinking about reverence, my mind immediately goes to God, the great Creator. For He is the one that deserves my reverence. It is through the blood of His Son that my sin filled past no longer exists and that my future is secure if I will continue to obey Him/revere Him. When thinking about the "ordinary" in my life and the daily tasks I am given to do, I am reminded of the passage that says, "Work heartily as to the Lord." "Whatever you do, in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord." God is my employer...it is for Him that I work. Therefore whatever the task is, I must remember that it is a privilege to do it for my God. Sure, sometimes others reap the benefits from the tasks that I do-but this is not the motivation from within-it is my love/reverence for God that keeps me on task. Which brings me to the second thought-one way to keep my priorities straight is to evaluate my task at hand and decide if it has "eternal" consequences/benefits. My greatest desire/goal is to "seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness", therefore obtaining the great reward of Heaven when I leave this life. In a day full of so many good/wholesome activities to choose from-I must exercise self control and decide which are the "best" things I can choose. Does my task/activity help me to meet my goal in some way? If not, perhaps my time/effort is better spent letting go of some activities and choosing something more profitable for me/others spiritually. Never in the history of mankind have we had so many avenues/opportunities to "do/be" so many things. Choice abounds everywhere! The more noble path is the one which understands that the choices we make help frame our life. The most important choice any of us will ever make is whether we will choose to follow God and His path toward eternal reward. In the details/tasks of daily life I fear this is often forgotten and overlooked by most of us. This is one of Satan's greatest tools-"diversion". If he can keep us distracted...even with "good" things/choices, then he is succeeding in keeping us from a relationship with God. This idea of "good" things/choices...in the N.T., James reminds us that "all good and perfect gifts come down from above." Perhaps part of the problem is that we define "good" based on our own earthly experiences instead of through the eyes of God. Since God is the giver of all things "good", we should only follow after those things which will bring us closer to God. Even if a task/activity/choice cannot be defined as "sin", it does not necessarily mean the thing is "good" for us. The only things truly "good" for us are the things which help us retain our focus on God. What a challenge it is to look at and seriously consider our daily activities strictly in relation to "how does this benefit me spiritually?" What you will find is that a LOT of our tasks/activities can be "good", therefore related to maintaining our focus on God. It merely has to do with regaining a proper/spiritual perspective. That perspective must come from God. The way to gain that perspective is to meditate/spend time reflecting on the Word of God so that we can better understand each day the way that God thinks, who God is, what God desires, etc... This requires time. Time spent trying to better understand God's purpose for us is the most important way we can use our time. It also requires solitude. Solitude is different for each of us at different stages in our lives. When I was the mother of preschool children, it meant that I got up "earlier" than my children to be alone in the stillness/quietness of the morning so that I could seek the face of God. It involved some sacrifice on my part-giving up a bit of sleep. But, that time passes very quickly and the reward from that time alone w/God is eternal for me:) Now that my children are older, it means that once they have gone off to school, I have time to be alone, with God, observing what He says, "Be still and know that I am God." God does not expect us to live in seclusion, He expects us to "live in the world, but not be of the world." God expects us to be "different" than those that have not yet chosen to be His obedient child. This will require our perspective to be different, which will require us to spend time with Him in His word. I am reminded of the scripture in Romans 12:1-2 which says, "I beseech you therefore brethren, by the mercies of God that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God." God sent His Son to be a sacrifice for our sins, it is "reasonable" for us to present our own bodies in God's service. Not because God "NEEDS" our service, God created the world in 6 days merely by SPEAKING it into existence...He does not "need" us/our service...instead He desires to have relationship with us. One of the ways we are "set apart"(holy) is through our service to Him, not merely our service to ourselves or mankind. Renewing our minds-that is what will help us know what is GOOD. If left to our own devices and deciding for ourselves what God wants/what the mind of God is...we would be forever lost. What a blessing to have God's word, forever preserved for us through the guidance/protection of the Holy Spirit. Let us each seek to understand/know God better each day by renewing our minds with that blessed word. Which brings me to my final thought-creating a sacred space for yourself to renew your mind. It is important to have a specific "place" that you can go to enjoy solitude and renewing your mind with God's word. Again, that place will be different for each of us and can change with stages of life. When my children were younger, my sacred space was my bedroom-my nightstand contained the various "tools" I needed (the word of God, study guides, bible study books, etc...) to focus on God. Today, my sacred space is in my recliner in my living room where I have a picture of my girls, a basket full of "tools" that I use for study/encouragement, and my laptop that I use for blogging and encouraging others to seek God. In more recent years, I have also implemented a "get away" retreat for myself with God chicks. This gives me a week away from daily "tasks" to refocus my time/energy on the purpose of my life while encouraging my sisters to press ever upward toward that goal of Heaven. I treasure the time I have away at retreats/summer youth bible camp. Those are some of the greatest times of in depth spiritual focus for me. Start thinking about these things for yourself today. Do you think of God as your employer, or do you see your job merely as providing a paycheck? Are you seeking the "good" things, the things which bring you closer to God/understanding God? Do you have a sacred space? A space just for you where you can join God and focus on eternal things? I challenge each of us to not allow Satan to "divert" our attention, instead choose the more noble/sacrificial path toward an eternal home with God.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
The Problem of Abundant Living
I've mentioned before that I read all types of books, listen to CD's, most especially the bible and things written that help me meditate more deeply on the things of God. This morning I was thinking about the title of my blog and was reminded that so many people seem to believe that abundant living is beyond their reach. It is something they can only hope for but never attain. This thought took me in search of a book I read several years ago that contained a chapter with the title, "The Problem of Abundant Living". I thought I might share some thoughts that I came away with after reading that chapter.
Here are some misconceptions about abundant living:
1) It does not require a long life on this earth to live well. A person can either live well for the short period of time God gives them or can waste many years of a long life by being absorbed in themselves.
2) Living well does not require secular knowledge. You do not have to have a college education to live well-but you do have to have a knowledge that remembers your Creator.
3) It does not require material wealth to live well. Jesus said, "A man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he posesses." Luke 12:15
So what are some truths that help us to live abundantly:
1) Life must have a "center". There must be something we live our lives for, a point of reference. For me, Jesus is that center. The focus of my life the thing I can return to. Apostle Paul said, "For to me to live is Christ." Jesus is the "way, the truth and the life."
2) Life must be lived w/optimism. Optimism is an attitude for success. It says, "If God be for us, who can be against us." Optimism is attractive and draws people toward a greater hope. Wouldn't you rather eat with a person that enjoys the delicious taste/texture of a donut than someone that can only gripe about the hole in the donut and fails to appreciate the taste/texture?
3) Must be hesitant to find fault and criticize. If I remain conscious of my own imperfections, I will be more tolerant of faults in others. Fault finding is a tool many use to build themselves up while condemning another. Don't be discouraged when others find fault with you. Jesus was the only sinless person to ever live. We are not ever going to please everyone-but, we can do what's right and that's all that matters anyway. Let others criticize, rest in the truth that you have done what is right according to God. As Peter says, "For it is better if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing." I Peter 3:17
4) Accept that other people have a viewpoint and it may be different than yours. Differing viewpoints are no different than differing hair colors-it is all relative to the individual. Of course I am not talking about a person that will follow their own will with neglect or disregard for God's. As God's creation, we should all have the mind of Christ who said, "Not as I will, but as thou wilt." This is merely to say that culture, early home life, life experiences, etc... give each of us a different perspective in life. Therefore, in matters of indifference to God, we should follow the advice of Paul in Romans 14;19-"Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another."
5) Easily admitting when we have been wrong. Some of the greatest people of God have made mistakes. Moses, Peter, David (a man after God's own heart). What set these apart is their ability to confess their sins to both God and man. Many try to avoid mistakes just by doing nothing at all-but James warns "Therefore to him that knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin." Doing nothing because of fear that we will make a mistake is a sin to avoid. Admitting we're wrong or that we've made a mistake is just saying that you are wiser today than you were yesterday.
6) Forgiveness is necessary to live abundantly. We cannot receive forgiveness from God if we do not forgive others. (Matthew 6:15) Forgiveness requires us to forget. Forgetting all wrongs suffered and moving forward to new life. Joseph is an excellent example of this. Though his brothers wronged him, Joseph was so glad to see his brothers that his heart was opened and he moved forward to help them-knowing that God had a greater plan all along. So many think that if they forgive, then justice is not served. Truly forgiving requires mercy-something undeserved. That is what God does for us-He shows us mercy when we come to Him obediently. We deserve death, but He gives us mercy. James says, "God shall execute judgment without mercy, to those that hath showed no mercy."-James 2:13
7) Being unafraid helps us live abundantly. Fear can be overcome by faith, hope and love (I Corinthians 13:13). Even if we lose a few battles along the way, we can still win the war. God+me=majority:)
Here are some misconceptions about abundant living:
1) It does not require a long life on this earth to live well. A person can either live well for the short period of time God gives them or can waste many years of a long life by being absorbed in themselves.
2) Living well does not require secular knowledge. You do not have to have a college education to live well-but you do have to have a knowledge that remembers your Creator.
3) It does not require material wealth to live well. Jesus said, "A man's life consisteth not in the abundance of the things which he posesses." Luke 12:15
So what are some truths that help us to live abundantly:
1) Life must have a "center". There must be something we live our lives for, a point of reference. For me, Jesus is that center. The focus of my life the thing I can return to. Apostle Paul said, "For to me to live is Christ." Jesus is the "way, the truth and the life."
2) Life must be lived w/optimism. Optimism is an attitude for success. It says, "If God be for us, who can be against us." Optimism is attractive and draws people toward a greater hope. Wouldn't you rather eat with a person that enjoys the delicious taste/texture of a donut than someone that can only gripe about the hole in the donut and fails to appreciate the taste/texture?
3) Must be hesitant to find fault and criticize. If I remain conscious of my own imperfections, I will be more tolerant of faults in others. Fault finding is a tool many use to build themselves up while condemning another. Don't be discouraged when others find fault with you. Jesus was the only sinless person to ever live. We are not ever going to please everyone-but, we can do what's right and that's all that matters anyway. Let others criticize, rest in the truth that you have done what is right according to God. As Peter says, "For it is better if the will of God be so, that ye suffer for well doing, than for evil doing." I Peter 3:17
4) Accept that other people have a viewpoint and it may be different than yours. Differing viewpoints are no different than differing hair colors-it is all relative to the individual. Of course I am not talking about a person that will follow their own will with neglect or disregard for God's. As God's creation, we should all have the mind of Christ who said, "Not as I will, but as thou wilt." This is merely to say that culture, early home life, life experiences, etc... give each of us a different perspective in life. Therefore, in matters of indifference to God, we should follow the advice of Paul in Romans 14;19-"Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another."
5) Easily admitting when we have been wrong. Some of the greatest people of God have made mistakes. Moses, Peter, David (a man after God's own heart). What set these apart is their ability to confess their sins to both God and man. Many try to avoid mistakes just by doing nothing at all-but James warns "Therefore to him that knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin." Doing nothing because of fear that we will make a mistake is a sin to avoid. Admitting we're wrong or that we've made a mistake is just saying that you are wiser today than you were yesterday.
6) Forgiveness is necessary to live abundantly. We cannot receive forgiveness from God if we do not forgive others. (Matthew 6:15) Forgiveness requires us to forget. Forgetting all wrongs suffered and moving forward to new life. Joseph is an excellent example of this. Though his brothers wronged him, Joseph was so glad to see his brothers that his heart was opened and he moved forward to help them-knowing that God had a greater plan all along. So many think that if they forgive, then justice is not served. Truly forgiving requires mercy-something undeserved. That is what God does for us-He shows us mercy when we come to Him obediently. We deserve death, but He gives us mercy. James says, "God shall execute judgment without mercy, to those that hath showed no mercy."-James 2:13
7) Being unafraid helps us live abundantly. Fear can be overcome by faith, hope and love (I Corinthians 13:13). Even if we lose a few battles along the way, we can still win the war. God+me=majority:)
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
February 22-Inspirational Thoughts
I haven't blogged much over the last couple of weeks. Mainly due to the fact that I was sick and needed to play catch up following my illness. However, today I was reading/meditating on some scripture then read through my daily inspirational book and found that I have several things to ponder. First, I will give a brief synopsis of the last 2 days of thoughts that my Simple Abundance book offers, then I'll just blog about a few things that are on my heart.
Feb.21-Excavating the Real You-part 1
For centuries, women display their sense of style through their personal appearance, the way they decorate their homes, how they entertain, in the work they do, and in their own pursuit of personal passions. The more we learn about ourselves, the easier it is to make these choices that reflect our authentic self. Today-consider the choices you have made in the past. Do you tend to make choices w/your heart, mind, or instinct? Are you comfortable w/the style you use in making choices? Was there something you did not choose in the past you wish you had?
Feb. 22-Excavating the Real You-part 2
Take your mind back to the home of your childhood. How was it decorated? Did you clean your room? What was your favorite spot in the house? Was your mother a good cook? Where did you go on vacation? Fast forward to your teenage years. Any girls in school that you admired? Envied? Who were they and why? Now go to when you set up your first home. Where was it? How was it furnished/decorated? Are your early decorating choices reflected in your current surroundings? We tend to think it is the major events that mark our lives, really it is the minor moments and simple things that resonate in our memory. Pick one pleasant recollection of your past and think about it today.
Learning about ourselves, where we have come from and where we are going, can be either a painful or a pleasant experience, sometimes its both. I'm sure there is no one that doesn't associate some unpleasantness with some of the experiences that have led them to where they are today. This life is full of both pain and joy. Without pain, we cannot understand/appreciate joy. Without joy, we would never have hope that the pain would pass. For me, I have discovered that truly getting to know the person God has created me to be is a pleasure. Oh, that is not to say that the process hasn't brought it's share of heartache/pain. But, in the small moments of my life that resonate deeply within, I enjoy the process of coming to know the real me. Certainly it isn't because the real me is without fault. It is because despite my fault/weaknesses, God continues to show me love and longsuffering each day. Each day is a new beginning, a time to redeem-always a second chance with God as long as I am seeking Him-to know Him better, to love Him better. Each of us is important to God. We're important because He created us-with our own unique talents/gifts/pain/experiences/etc... There is no one like us-we are an individual. Despite the fact that we are raised by earthly parents in a unit called, "home", our deepest longing is to be at HOME with God. God created us with eternity in our hearts. It is the one thing that remains common among each of us-the longing for something greater-the thing that makes us God's creation-our souls. It doesn't matter what our past experiences have been-it is what we choose to do with those past experiences that matter. Do we allow them to immobilize us or motivate us? Do we allow them to move us closer to God and the eternity He's placed within us or do we choose to become more frustrated because we feel "empty" and useless due to moving further away from God and His purpose for us. One of the things that I've learned in this discovery process is how little I know. I remember, at different points in my life, feeling like I had certain things figured out. Alas, what I realize is how little I know about anything. The more I learn, the more I realize I will never know it all. I will never have it all figured out. Why? Because I am not God. Only God knows all, is ever present, is eternal. I will only know/understand it better in eternity-when I am with God. Until then, I continue to learn lessons of all types through my experiences in this life, by spending time in God's word-which is the ultimate source of wisdom, etc... It is when we choose not to learn from our experiences and therefore go through the same process day in/day out feeling empty, unfulfilled, coming up w/same results, etc...that we come to realize the need for wisdom God has to offer. It is evident that some never learn this lesson. They continue in a vicious life cycle of not learning from their mistakes, doing the same thing day in/day out, always trying to find "happiness" in the things of this world through its devices. Love of the world, things in the world will never bring us fulfillment. It will bring us no more than a fleeting moment of pleasure. It is through eternal things-the deeper more meaningful moments (the simple things) of life that will bring us fulfillment. Not the moments most people scrapbook or document-graduations, special "bdays", etc...but instead the simple little things like having lunch each week w/a friend to share the joys/heartaches of life together, to encourage one another to continue living each moment to the fullest FOR THE LORD, etc...It's the time we take to send a card, email, make a phone call, just to talk about "life", the normal moments that make up each day. Time is such a precious gift-it is the one gift that resonates with me from my past, present, and future. Time spent just "being" with someone we love is so important. Not always "literally" being together-sometimes we are with them through emails, phone calls, texts, cards, etc... The reality is that time is fleeting and if we do not redeem the time we have NOW, it could be gone tomorrow. We are all dying. From the moment we are born-we all share the same fate-death. Unless Christ returns before our day of death-we each will face it at a time that only God knows. Do not take time for granted, it is such a precious gift that could be gone tomorrow. Truly finding my authentic self has meant coming to the realization that how I use my time is the greatest gift I can ever give to my family, my brethren, my friends, myself, and most importantly my God. It is a "free" gift in that it is given to each of us just by virtue of waking up to a new day that God has created. Never assume that this gift is endless and will always be available. Time is fleeting, the moments are passing as we get closer to eternity. The question I ask myself each day is "am I using my time to glorify God?" Glorifying God involves the small choices I make with how I use my time each day. Am I using my time to know Him more deeply through studying His word so that I may know how to use my time more wisely in ways that truly make an eternal difference? Am I using God's wisdom to direct my daily activities? I try to-I am not always successful. Sometimes I get caught up in details of big life event moments. Then I remember to ask myself-"If I were laying on my death bed, what would be important for me at that moment? Would this be worth the time I'm giving it or would I desire to go back and use my time differently?" I truly desire to "live like I am dying" as Tim McGraw so aptly sang in a song a few years ago. It is the best way to live, the eternal way to live, the most fulfilling way to live. I want only to have made a difference in the lives of those I know/meet day to day with regard to having them consider their purpose in this life. Why are you here? What difference are you making? God designed each of us to live for HIM, not for ourselves or the fleeting pleasures of the day. What is your motivation for living/choosing the activities that make up your daily life? Mine is simply to bring honor/glory to my Creator-for it is with Him that I will dwell in eternity.
So, what does living authentically mean for me? It means putting on the mind of Christ, becoming more like Jesus. It means choosing to just let a LOT of things "go", not dwelling on them, not allowing them to affect my daily existence. It means choosing to enjoy my time on this earth by bringing glory to God, because it is a gift that is only available for a short time. It means truly examining myself each day, growing in the wisdom of God through studying His word so that I may know Him more. It means saying "I love you and so does God" by not merely words-but more importantly through my actions/behavior/making people a priority to be available to encourage them in the ways of God. There is a hymn that I am reminded of that sums up my desire to live authentically and the words are as follows:
"I have one deep supreme desire, that I may be like Jesus. To this I fervently aspire, that I may be like Jesus. I want my heart His throne to be, so that a watching world may see. His likeness shining forth in me, that I may be like Jesus. He spent His life in doing good, I want to be like Jesus. My recompense and my reward, that I may be like Jesus. His spirit fills my hungering soul, His power all my life control. My deepest prayer, my highest goal, that I may be like Jesus."
There is also a contemporary song that says:
"I don't want to go through the motions, I don't want to live one more day, without Your all consuming, passion inside of me. I don't want to live my whole life asking, what if I had given everything...instead of going through the motions."
I pray that each of us will live each moment of every day with eternity as our focus...living passionately for a God that loves us and desires relationship with us through the precious blood of His only Son, Jesus Christ.
Feb.21-Excavating the Real You-part 1
For centuries, women display their sense of style through their personal appearance, the way they decorate their homes, how they entertain, in the work they do, and in their own pursuit of personal passions. The more we learn about ourselves, the easier it is to make these choices that reflect our authentic self. Today-consider the choices you have made in the past. Do you tend to make choices w/your heart, mind, or instinct? Are you comfortable w/the style you use in making choices? Was there something you did not choose in the past you wish you had?
Feb. 22-Excavating the Real You-part 2
Take your mind back to the home of your childhood. How was it decorated? Did you clean your room? What was your favorite spot in the house? Was your mother a good cook? Where did you go on vacation? Fast forward to your teenage years. Any girls in school that you admired? Envied? Who were they and why? Now go to when you set up your first home. Where was it? How was it furnished/decorated? Are your early decorating choices reflected in your current surroundings? We tend to think it is the major events that mark our lives, really it is the minor moments and simple things that resonate in our memory. Pick one pleasant recollection of your past and think about it today.
Learning about ourselves, where we have come from and where we are going, can be either a painful or a pleasant experience, sometimes its both. I'm sure there is no one that doesn't associate some unpleasantness with some of the experiences that have led them to where they are today. This life is full of both pain and joy. Without pain, we cannot understand/appreciate joy. Without joy, we would never have hope that the pain would pass. For me, I have discovered that truly getting to know the person God has created me to be is a pleasure. Oh, that is not to say that the process hasn't brought it's share of heartache/pain. But, in the small moments of my life that resonate deeply within, I enjoy the process of coming to know the real me. Certainly it isn't because the real me is without fault. It is because despite my fault/weaknesses, God continues to show me love and longsuffering each day. Each day is a new beginning, a time to redeem-always a second chance with God as long as I am seeking Him-to know Him better, to love Him better. Each of us is important to God. We're important because He created us-with our own unique talents/gifts/pain/experiences/etc... There is no one like us-we are an individual. Despite the fact that we are raised by earthly parents in a unit called, "home", our deepest longing is to be at HOME with God. God created us with eternity in our hearts. It is the one thing that remains common among each of us-the longing for something greater-the thing that makes us God's creation-our souls. It doesn't matter what our past experiences have been-it is what we choose to do with those past experiences that matter. Do we allow them to immobilize us or motivate us? Do we allow them to move us closer to God and the eternity He's placed within us or do we choose to become more frustrated because we feel "empty" and useless due to moving further away from God and His purpose for us. One of the things that I've learned in this discovery process is how little I know. I remember, at different points in my life, feeling like I had certain things figured out. Alas, what I realize is how little I know about anything. The more I learn, the more I realize I will never know it all. I will never have it all figured out. Why? Because I am not God. Only God knows all, is ever present, is eternal. I will only know/understand it better in eternity-when I am with God. Until then, I continue to learn lessons of all types through my experiences in this life, by spending time in God's word-which is the ultimate source of wisdom, etc... It is when we choose not to learn from our experiences and therefore go through the same process day in/day out feeling empty, unfulfilled, coming up w/same results, etc...that we come to realize the need for wisdom God has to offer. It is evident that some never learn this lesson. They continue in a vicious life cycle of not learning from their mistakes, doing the same thing day in/day out, always trying to find "happiness" in the things of this world through its devices. Love of the world, things in the world will never bring us fulfillment. It will bring us no more than a fleeting moment of pleasure. It is through eternal things-the deeper more meaningful moments (the simple things) of life that will bring us fulfillment. Not the moments most people scrapbook or document-graduations, special "bdays", etc...but instead the simple little things like having lunch each week w/a friend to share the joys/heartaches of life together, to encourage one another to continue living each moment to the fullest FOR THE LORD, etc...It's the time we take to send a card, email, make a phone call, just to talk about "life", the normal moments that make up each day. Time is such a precious gift-it is the one gift that resonates with me from my past, present, and future. Time spent just "being" with someone we love is so important. Not always "literally" being together-sometimes we are with them through emails, phone calls, texts, cards, etc... The reality is that time is fleeting and if we do not redeem the time we have NOW, it could be gone tomorrow. We are all dying. From the moment we are born-we all share the same fate-death. Unless Christ returns before our day of death-we each will face it at a time that only God knows. Do not take time for granted, it is such a precious gift that could be gone tomorrow. Truly finding my authentic self has meant coming to the realization that how I use my time is the greatest gift I can ever give to my family, my brethren, my friends, myself, and most importantly my God. It is a "free" gift in that it is given to each of us just by virtue of waking up to a new day that God has created. Never assume that this gift is endless and will always be available. Time is fleeting, the moments are passing as we get closer to eternity. The question I ask myself each day is "am I using my time to glorify God?" Glorifying God involves the small choices I make with how I use my time each day. Am I using my time to know Him more deeply through studying His word so that I may know how to use my time more wisely in ways that truly make an eternal difference? Am I using God's wisdom to direct my daily activities? I try to-I am not always successful. Sometimes I get caught up in details of big life event moments. Then I remember to ask myself-"If I were laying on my death bed, what would be important for me at that moment? Would this be worth the time I'm giving it or would I desire to go back and use my time differently?" I truly desire to "live like I am dying" as Tim McGraw so aptly sang in a song a few years ago. It is the best way to live, the eternal way to live, the most fulfilling way to live. I want only to have made a difference in the lives of those I know/meet day to day with regard to having them consider their purpose in this life. Why are you here? What difference are you making? God designed each of us to live for HIM, not for ourselves or the fleeting pleasures of the day. What is your motivation for living/choosing the activities that make up your daily life? Mine is simply to bring honor/glory to my Creator-for it is with Him that I will dwell in eternity.
So, what does living authentically mean for me? It means putting on the mind of Christ, becoming more like Jesus. It means choosing to just let a LOT of things "go", not dwelling on them, not allowing them to affect my daily existence. It means choosing to enjoy my time on this earth by bringing glory to God, because it is a gift that is only available for a short time. It means truly examining myself each day, growing in the wisdom of God through studying His word so that I may know Him more. It means saying "I love you and so does God" by not merely words-but more importantly through my actions/behavior/making people a priority to be available to encourage them in the ways of God. There is a hymn that I am reminded of that sums up my desire to live authentically and the words are as follows:
"I have one deep supreme desire, that I may be like Jesus. To this I fervently aspire, that I may be like Jesus. I want my heart His throne to be, so that a watching world may see. His likeness shining forth in me, that I may be like Jesus. He spent His life in doing good, I want to be like Jesus. My recompense and my reward, that I may be like Jesus. His spirit fills my hungering soul, His power all my life control. My deepest prayer, my highest goal, that I may be like Jesus."
There is also a contemporary song that says:
"I don't want to go through the motions, I don't want to live one more day, without Your all consuming, passion inside of me. I don't want to live my whole life asking, what if I had given everything...instead of going through the motions."
I pray that each of us will live each moment of every day with eternity as our focus...living passionately for a God that loves us and desires relationship with us through the precious blood of His only Son, Jesus Christ.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
February 16-What a week!
This morning is the first time in over a week that I actually have enough energy to resume my daily routine again. The last time I blogged, it was about how sore I was from the new exercise/strength training class I went to. Well, the soreness lead way to a bout w/early symptomatic pneumonia. Of course the illness came just in time for the largest snow storm of the year! Last week was "eventful" to say the least. It started off well enough with the monthly MOPS meeting on Monday night. I didn't feel "just right", but made it through the meeting. Tuesday I went to the commissary because we had very little fruit/veggies in the house and I was anticipating the impending "snow storm" they were predicting for Wednesday. Still didn't feel "just right" on Tuesday-as a matter of fact felt very fatiqued and slept for 4 hours straight in the middle of the day. Had a fever by Tuesday evening-but of course then it was too late to see anyone at the base by that time. I knew by Wednesday morning something was "really" wrong. It is very difficult to forget the bout I had with pneumonia 2 years ago this month. There is NO feeling like not being able to breathe a normal breath without feeling as though you are suffocating, not eating for several days, etc... This feeling was returning to me last Wednesday morning and I called a dear sister that is a medical practitioner and asked her to drive over to take a look at me so that if I needed an antibiotic-I could get it before the weather got any worse. Alas, I was prescribed an antibiotic, cough suppressant, and an inhaler in case my breathing became labored. Within 24 hrs I was feeling better and I'm so thankful for the people God places in my path each day that are there just at the right time/place! I am also very thankful for modern medicine. I know that many people do not like the idea of taking meds-over the counter-or otherwise. I, however, am generally a very healthy person and I do NOT take any medication flippantly. I use meds judiciously-but because of that, when i do NEED a medication, it works wonders for me and for that I am thankful:) So, last weeks saga continued with about 8" of snow here in central Arkansas. Of course I did not feel well at all, so I just sat in my recliner watching the snow fall, drinking loads of water, coughing, bundled in my blanket. It was beautiful to watch. Thursday, very little of the white stuff had disappeared. I was still under the weather-but my fever was finally gone and I ate a few bites of food but was having some trouble keeping much down without feeling very sick to my stomach. I finally realized it was the antibiotic that was hurting my stomach. John called me from work that day and he got official notification that he will be going to the desert for a year in July. Of course, if I would have felt better, this news may have struck me differently. But, due to timing, I couldn't really even fully process what he was saying. I was not surprised that he got the notification. He applied for the job because he really needed to get out of his job here and this was a good opportunity to go someplace and really enjoy what he does for a year. At the end of the year, he will get a new/final assignment with the USAF:) We are praying for the assignment to be in central Missouri-Whiteman AFB. We are considering retiring to that area (near my sister/her family), so this would be excellent timing for that final assignment/prepare to retire. Friday came around and we made the decision to go ahead with our weekend trip to LA to visit our dear God peeps, the Lefort's. The roads were still a little "iffy" here in this area, but we knew once we got a little further south, things would be totally clear and the weekend was going to be nice/warm. So, we waited to leave until about noon and headed south to LA. It was an uneventful trip-no problems at all once we got south of Little Rock, just slow going at various places until that point. Of course coughing and driving can make for an interesting combo-but none of the girls in the car w/me seemed to mind-they were just glad to go spend the weekend with their friend, Julia:) We had a very nice weekend with our friends. I was slowly able to "eat" a little more each day. I was still a bit fatiqued because I had not eaten much in 4-5 days, so I did have to take a nap on Saturday for a bit. Sunday was the first time I ate one "normal" meal for lunch after services. I was sorry that Jessica couldn't join us because William was home with strep throat. Now I'm just praying none of the girls we took with us get it:( So, yes, it was quite a week-sickness, new assignment for hubby, trip to LA all in one week! I'm just trying to get my house back in order today. Yesterday was the first day I ate an entire day's worth of "normal" meals-so my energy level is coming back up. I had lunch with my HIPPY gal pals on Monday after group meeting, lunch with my God chick Amy yesterday, and today I will be lunching w/myself right here in my own house-for the first time in a week! So, yes, it has been quite a week around here! For those of you that may be following the inspirational thought that I post from time to time-please forgive my inability to keep up! I will do what I can when I can. I am hosting book club for Michaela's friends here on Friday night. Sunday afternoon, I am attending a spring formal banquet planning meeting. In the middle of this, I am planning a murder mystery dinner party for ladies night for the God chicks in the church here for next Thursday night. So, yes, I have just a little on my plate right now. I would like to share today's thought with you:
Feb16-"Fear of failing, fear of starting something new and not finishing. We might not be happy with the way we are living now, but at least it's safely familiar. If you feel frightened or unsure about the future, remember life isn't an adventure worth telling if there aren't any unfamiliars."
Certainly in the months ahead, I will be reminding myself of that idea. As a military spouse, these next 4 months will bring loads of challenges as I prepare to be without my hubby for the next year (unfamiliar territory). We've been apart for 4 months for deployment-but the year long assignment will be new/unfamiliar. However, I do know that a year passes quickly and that the adventure that waits on the other side for us will be well worth it:) Just be looking for me to write about my feelings here in this blog in the months/year ahead as I enter this new zone. I'm not afraid of the upcoming year-I embrace it because I know that God has it ALL worked out for my good-Romans 8:28!:)
Feb16-"Fear of failing, fear of starting something new and not finishing. We might not be happy with the way we are living now, but at least it's safely familiar. If you feel frightened or unsure about the future, remember life isn't an adventure worth telling if there aren't any unfamiliars."
Certainly in the months ahead, I will be reminding myself of that idea. As a military spouse, these next 4 months will bring loads of challenges as I prepare to be without my hubby for the next year (unfamiliar territory). We've been apart for 4 months for deployment-but the year long assignment will be new/unfamiliar. However, I do know that a year passes quickly and that the adventure that waits on the other side for us will be well worth it:) Just be looking for me to write about my feelings here in this blog in the months/year ahead as I enter this new zone. I'm not afraid of the upcoming year-I embrace it because I know that God has it ALL worked out for my good-Romans 8:28!:)
Sunday, February 6, 2011
On my way
I am sitting here this early a.m. because muscles in my body (that I didn't even remember existed) have screamed out to me all night every time I moved:( Being sore is the "stinky" part of a newly implemented strength routine. Of course it's been years (10 to be exact) since I've done any strength training and last night brought back some painful memories-pardon the pun! The last time I felt this sore was beginning of September 2001, shortly before my Mom died. I had begun working out w/weights w/my friend Mary Beth at the base gym and I woke up 2 days later w/so much pain in my body that I was desperate for relief. The girls/I were heading to my parent's to celebrate Michaela's 5th b-day and I could barely move while I was driving. Mom had been on some serious pain meds for her feet/legs prior to gastric bypass and graciously offered me some "relief" through half a darvocet (not sure that's how you spell it-just know it's no longer on the market any long-GOOD riddance!). I know, I should not have been taking anyone else's prescipt meds, but it was a Saturday, I wasn't near the base to get prescript myself, and I had tried all otc meds and nothing was touching the pain-so I was desperate! All it took was about 15 min and I felt "nothing", much less pain-it was if I was paralyzed-but unfortunately on the heels of that numbing came vomit:( I got SO sick-it was absolutely terrible! I didn't even pretend to understand how my mom could have ever stomached those things 2 at a time! So, once that half pill wore off and the vomiting stopped-I experienced the pain from my newly discovered muscles again. Memories-a beautiful thing, but can sometimes be painful as well-WOW-I'm really on a role w/the pain puns today!lol
All of this to say that even though I am currently experiencing this pain-I know it is necessary given the unused condition of my muscles. It is a reminder that I'm "on my way" to better health. It can sometimes be hard/difficult to go through the struggles (temptations, pain, etc..) that it takes to improve health-but I know the payoff will be worth the pain in the experience. I went through plenty of struggle to carry/birth/raise 2 beautiful daughters-but truly, that has been such a rewarding experience. I know that, on the other side of this pain, awaits a new me, one that is physically strong. Finally free from the bondage of a sedentary lifestyle, free from advertising/marketing of fragmented junk food, free from life threatning health diseases, free to finally be able to do/be all that God has designed for me to be. So, I will press through the pain, return to the power pump class tomorrow a.m. so that I can reclaim my health one day at a time.
All of this to say that even though I am currently experiencing this pain-I know it is necessary given the unused condition of my muscles. It is a reminder that I'm "on my way" to better health. It can sometimes be hard/difficult to go through the struggles (temptations, pain, etc..) that it takes to improve health-but I know the payoff will be worth the pain in the experience. I went through plenty of struggle to carry/birth/raise 2 beautiful daughters-but truly, that has been such a rewarding experience. I know that, on the other side of this pain, awaits a new me, one that is physically strong. Finally free from the bondage of a sedentary lifestyle, free from advertising/marketing of fragmented junk food, free from life threatning health diseases, free to finally be able to do/be all that God has designed for me to be. So, I will press through the pain, return to the power pump class tomorrow a.m. so that I can reclaim my health one day at a time.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Inspirational Thoughts-February 3 and 4
Feb 3-"There are those special moments when our authenticity and reality merge into wholeness. Everything just falls into place. How do we tap into those moments more often? This varies-meditation, long walks, soaking in a bubble bath, etc...Above all, be open to change and welcome it. Rejoice and dream, kneel and pray!"
Feb 4-A quote by Robert Browning sums up today's thought well-"My business is not to remake myself, but make the absolute best of what God made." "Making the best of ourselves is not easy. It requires patience, persistence, perseverance, and prayer. We find it easier to live when we access the power above that illuminates our path. Don't try to make yourself into something you are not designed to be."
Today is an interesting day-the schools here have announced that school dismissed at 10:15 for "weather", which btw, it is no longer even snowing outside! It could turn into an event-or it may not. Truly does not matter to me one way or the other. The thoughts for the last couple of days have really struck me given a few conversations/thoughts I've had during the last 48 hours. First, there is the idea that we need to be "authentic"-genuine, not like "everyone else", but instead the person we're designed to be. Yesterday, I talked w/my sister about the possibility of my hubby/I coming to look at a house that is there in the town where she lives. This house is an "old" house, it is small (by American standards-1130 sq. ft. w/basement), has a small yard and will need to be totally refurbished-but as long as it is structurally sound-it is a serious consideration for us when John retires. You see, we are in a process of "discovery" as we quickly approach the end of this 30 year military journey. We have tossed around various ideas about various things that we might "do" when John retires from the AF, where we might live, etc... Will we own our own business, will John commute to work, will he work "from home", will I try to run a business, etc... We've concluded that "we've" worked very hard during this military journey and deserve some down time. Yes, John has been the military member that goes to work every day-but I certainly have done more than my fair share keeping a household up and running/moving around the country/world every 4 yrs or so...that is NO easy chore! Anyone that has ever moved knows how much work it is to make a move-even across town. I've always done my best to make the transition as quickly/smooth as possible so that our family life has had little disruption during these moves. This has allowed John the ability to just "go to work" in a new location knowing that I'm handling the "getting settled" part when we move. A business is not something we want to be "tied to". We're looking for less responsibility-not more-particularly as our girls are growing up and moving away from home into their own adult lives. Raising children has been the biggest responsibility of our lives! We're looking for more time, not for our time to be constrained by commuting or 9-5 jobs. More time to spend with each other, more time to spend with those we love (particularly our lovely 2 nieces:) The one thing we don't care anything about is more money. John has worked very hard for 26 years (soon will be 30) and that investment of time will soon pay off for us. John would like to tinker with some things he enjoys doing-like carpentry/gardening/etc.... Hence, one of the reasons we're contemplating buying an old house. Something we can "pay for" outright with savings we've built through the years-then remodel the house to our preference. I know everyone has different ideas about what a "retirement" home will look like. For us, it is small probably 2 bedroom/2 bath (downsizing-YES!), will have a small "yard" to maintain so John can tinker with flower garden out front, will have most of it's space in the living areas for us to be able to show hospitality to brethren/family/friends and allow us to be free from the bondage of a house payment for the rest of our lives! That sounds like EXACTLY what we authentically desire for our future retirement home. We hope to buy a small camping trailer with a slide for the 2 of us/Lizzie. We can even "live" in the camper on the property until we get the house remodeled the way we want. We can use the camper to travel to visit our girls/their families in the future. We can use the camper to travel to some places we've always wanted to visit in the U.S.-particularly Yellowstone, Grand Canyon, Grand Tetons, Pennsylvania Amish country, etc... We love to travel-but have been somewhat constrained by time to do as much of it as we'd like given that John has limited amt. of vacation days/per year and that we've had 2 girls to raise that have attended school that has offered us limitations as well. Less stuff to manage, less money to put out, more time to spend with those we love doing the things we love, more opportunities to travel the world together=retirement:) It's interesting that my sister/her family moved to the small town of Blackwater, Missouri just under 2 years ago. It is such an amazing little community with about 250 folks-so quaint-so much history there, so many COOL community events-something every month! They have a progressive dinner in the town, a town festival, a "themed" night party, a haunted hayride, a Christmas village walk, etc...just absolutely like stepping back in time! No stress, laid back-yet only 30 miles west of a college town (civilization:) that has every convenience you could want! They have a community theatre that hosts about 2-3 plays per year-I would LOVE to be a part of that! The only church in town is a congregation of the Lord's church and we just LOVE the brethren there...it's small, but so intimate and such fine Christian people:) My sister teaches at the small school there in town-SO cute-very old, but indeed a wonderful community for her to be raising her girls! Then there is Arrow Rock-a national historic town-just less than 10 miles away. They have a Lyceum theatre-just a sweet old country chapel that has been restored and hosts about 15 live broadway shows every year-I'd LOVE to have season tickets:) Until my sister moved to Blackwater, John and I had NO idea where we might want to retire! We loved living overseas, but knew that was impractical because of the expense. We have only lived in Arkansas and North Carolina here in the U.S. during this AF journey. We thought perhaps AR was the place for us to retire, probably because it was "comfortable/familiar". We've since discovered it will require too much of the things we want to "rid" ourselves of to remain here. North Carolina has some amazing sights-but we don't really have any real "draws" there either. I was so excited when my sister moved to Blackwater and I went to visit-it was the first place that really "spoke" to me! I knew John would LOVE it-amazing outdoor activities and rural country living-he's always wanted that. We only had the opportunity for that when we lived in England on the farm. It was SUCH a blessing-I'm glad to have had that blessing because it gave me a different perspective. I am a person that gets their "energy", zeal for life from "people". But, what I discovered in England was that I also love being away from the hustle/bustle, having much alone time with God, and a much slower pace of life. It's like God has planted stepping stones for me to discover things about myself all along and has led me to a dream that is closer to John's. Of course we both love the idea of being with my sister and her family. Watching my nieces grow up, just experiencing every day life with them-going to ballgames, school musical productions, etc...It'll be like watching them experience the same life we have-just 15 years later:) We can "relate" to my sister/her family-we too, have lived away from physical family most of our adult lives. They are just beginning their journey as ours is ending. It will give us opportunity to be "pseudo" grandparents until our own grandchildren arrive some day. John/I both have realized that it's important not to make ANY move strictly based on family, the definition of "family" changes every year as those we love die, new ones are born, etc... We truly believe that Blackwater is a community we could truly enjoy living in and finally die in some day-even if my sister's family were not there. Through my sister-God has introduced us to a place that our hearts are now in love with-a place where we can grow old together, enjoy life together, just "be" together. Of course having a sister that is a "star" teacher at the small community school sure will help us get "started" there. My sister and I are a lot alike in some very significant ways-we both never meet a stranger, so she already has made some very deep connections in the community. I talked with her about the possibility of John/I substituing as custodians, cooks, groundskeepers, etc... at the school for extra play money when we get a hankering to take a trip somewhere special that may require a bit more funds-she says that should not be an issue AT ALL! In the meantime, we'll just live in the community-enjoy everyday simple living and take a weekly jaunt into the "city" for our groceries/special outings. I feel so extremely blessed-I have had such a wonderful life along this military journey. Until the last year or so, I was very "hesitant" about what our future might hold. Change can be difficult-though you would think having lived this life I'd be accustomed to change. I suppose I am-but this change will be a "permanent" one. With the military-no matter where we were/what we were doing, it has only been "temporary"-it was coming to an end. The idea of living in the SAME place from late 40's til death was a daunting one for us! Now, I have a sense of "peace" and "belonging"-as well as a longing for the next 4 years to pass quickly so we can move into this next adventure in our lives together.
This last month has also been a time of rediscovery for me, personally. I began this year knowing that I would be going to a spiritual retreat that would challenge me to consider a "word" to focus on this year. Being an introspective person and a person that doesn't take things like that lightly, I did some serious thinking on the matter before I came to my word "health". Last night and today, I had a couple of "aha" moments with regards toward my focus word. I have experienced short "glimpses" of this type of authentic "health" moment in my life before. Once after Rebecca was born when I focused on my health. I went through 2 years of infertility and gained 100 pounds during that time from depression. I am not one to take a vow or make a promise flippantly-not to anyone, most especially God. During the time I was seeing a fertility specialist-I vowed to God that if I was able to conceive/deliver a healthy child-I would return to a healthier state so that I would be better equipped for a future pregnancy. I followed through with that vow-I walked/even jogged some and really ate very healthy-I was in the best shape I'd been in since H.S. Then we moved to Germany, I got pregnant a second time and for a year after delivery experienced post partum depression:( Again, I reverted to "food" for comfort in my depression. Thankfully I saw a Dr. that recommended that I "exercise" to release natural healthy mood enhancers-I was willing to try ANYTHING because I hated the depression. That time I became "obsessed" with exercise, 6 days week/2X per day-it was like a drug for me because I hated the depresssion SO much and I felt SO good when I was exercising! Since that time (that was 1998) I slowly have regained the weight. This time not from depression, just lack of activity and age I suppose! When we moved from Germany to the U.S. in 1999-that change took away my "gym" obsession. I was settling into yet another location, different stage of life, different responsibilities w/kids, etc... I've "walked" some with friends over the years since that time. I've always enjoyed that-gives us time to visit while getting some exercise. Moving from England back to U.S. took me away from my walking partner, Lori. Arriving back here gave me opportunity to walk again w/my friend Jen. Now Jen lives about 15 min. away-so it's not convenient AT ALL for us to get together to walk the way it was when I first arrived back here in Arkansas and she lived 2 miles down the road. This brings me to today. My daughter, Rebecca, is a Sr. in H.S. Rebecca is on a journey to college which she hopes leads to a license in dietitics and nutrition. It is a choice that has not surprised me! So much of her life she's had the experience of seeing "first hand" what lack of activity can do to a person's body-not just mine, but most of her extended family members as well. She experienced losing a g'mother at age 7 due to complications from gastric bypass surgery. She shares her concern for her g'pas health often-she sees that his poor health has given him low quality of life. On the other hand-she sees her own father that has exercised faithfully her entire life-he has done this because his career depended on it and he has taken the responsibility to provide for his family very seriously. Rebecca wants a better quality of life for herself without the extra burden of poor health. Rebecca's career choice seems to be a very "authentic" place for her to start changing the cycles of inactivity she's witnessed in those she loves. I am proud of her-she will excel in that career because it "means something" to her! She motivates me to want to be "healthier" again. She encouraged me by saying, "let's go to the gym together", this has lead to a gym membership here in town for all 3 of the girls in our house! The best part about all of this is that I can say that "authentically", I truly enjoy exercise. It's just a "change" that has been difficult to implement-but now that the adjustment period is over-it is providing so many blessings. Even though it exhausts me, I absolutely feel ENERGIZED by the activity/people at the gym...particularly the classes. I went to a power pump class (weight training) this a.m., WOW-it was an hour long, but I already feel stronger. Of course, time with both of my girls-exercising together-PRICELESS! Last night I was at a party (before going to the gym) and a friend remarked "how good I was looking"-that is honestly just a side benefit for me. The weight coming off slowly, my appearance changing, those are not the goal for me-indeed I just want to be healthy again. I want to be able to hike, golf, do all of the things with my husband that he enjoys doing when he retires:) I want to be able to sled with my nieces in that 2' of mid-Missouri snow every year! I want to live my life "fully" as God intended-part of that involves taking care of this temple that my spirit is housed in and where God's Spirit resides daily. I don't ever want to take my health for granted-the ability to walk, the ability to bike, etc...all of those things that are so easy to just dismiss. I'm praying for strength as I continue on this road to better health. It is a long road-it can be difficult because it's easy to slide back into unhealthy patterns. I will be true to my authentic self and be the person God has called me to be...a person of health that is learning/making strides every day.
Feb 4-A quote by Robert Browning sums up today's thought well-"My business is not to remake myself, but make the absolute best of what God made." "Making the best of ourselves is not easy. It requires patience, persistence, perseverance, and prayer. We find it easier to live when we access the power above that illuminates our path. Don't try to make yourself into something you are not designed to be."
Today is an interesting day-the schools here have announced that school dismissed at 10:15 for "weather", which btw, it is no longer even snowing outside! It could turn into an event-or it may not. Truly does not matter to me one way or the other. The thoughts for the last couple of days have really struck me given a few conversations/thoughts I've had during the last 48 hours. First, there is the idea that we need to be "authentic"-genuine, not like "everyone else", but instead the person we're designed to be. Yesterday, I talked w/my sister about the possibility of my hubby/I coming to look at a house that is there in the town where she lives. This house is an "old" house, it is small (by American standards-1130 sq. ft. w/basement), has a small yard and will need to be totally refurbished-but as long as it is structurally sound-it is a serious consideration for us when John retires. You see, we are in a process of "discovery" as we quickly approach the end of this 30 year military journey. We have tossed around various ideas about various things that we might "do" when John retires from the AF, where we might live, etc... Will we own our own business, will John commute to work, will he work "from home", will I try to run a business, etc... We've concluded that "we've" worked very hard during this military journey and deserve some down time. Yes, John has been the military member that goes to work every day-but I certainly have done more than my fair share keeping a household up and running/moving around the country/world every 4 yrs or so...that is NO easy chore! Anyone that has ever moved knows how much work it is to make a move-even across town. I've always done my best to make the transition as quickly/smooth as possible so that our family life has had little disruption during these moves. This has allowed John the ability to just "go to work" in a new location knowing that I'm handling the "getting settled" part when we move. A business is not something we want to be "tied to". We're looking for less responsibility-not more-particularly as our girls are growing up and moving away from home into their own adult lives. Raising children has been the biggest responsibility of our lives! We're looking for more time, not for our time to be constrained by commuting or 9-5 jobs. More time to spend with each other, more time to spend with those we love (particularly our lovely 2 nieces:) The one thing we don't care anything about is more money. John has worked very hard for 26 years (soon will be 30) and that investment of time will soon pay off for us. John would like to tinker with some things he enjoys doing-like carpentry/gardening/etc.... Hence, one of the reasons we're contemplating buying an old house. Something we can "pay for" outright with savings we've built through the years-then remodel the house to our preference. I know everyone has different ideas about what a "retirement" home will look like. For us, it is small probably 2 bedroom/2 bath (downsizing-YES!), will have a small "yard" to maintain so John can tinker with flower garden out front, will have most of it's space in the living areas for us to be able to show hospitality to brethren/family/friends and allow us to be free from the bondage of a house payment for the rest of our lives! That sounds like EXACTLY what we authentically desire for our future retirement home. We hope to buy a small camping trailer with a slide for the 2 of us/Lizzie. We can even "live" in the camper on the property until we get the house remodeled the way we want. We can use the camper to travel to visit our girls/their families in the future. We can use the camper to travel to some places we've always wanted to visit in the U.S.-particularly Yellowstone, Grand Canyon, Grand Tetons, Pennsylvania Amish country, etc... We love to travel-but have been somewhat constrained by time to do as much of it as we'd like given that John has limited amt. of vacation days/per year and that we've had 2 girls to raise that have attended school that has offered us limitations as well. Less stuff to manage, less money to put out, more time to spend with those we love doing the things we love, more opportunities to travel the world together=retirement:) It's interesting that my sister/her family moved to the small town of Blackwater, Missouri just under 2 years ago. It is such an amazing little community with about 250 folks-so quaint-so much history there, so many COOL community events-something every month! They have a progressive dinner in the town, a town festival, a "themed" night party, a haunted hayride, a Christmas village walk, etc...just absolutely like stepping back in time! No stress, laid back-yet only 30 miles west of a college town (civilization:) that has every convenience you could want! They have a community theatre that hosts about 2-3 plays per year-I would LOVE to be a part of that! The only church in town is a congregation of the Lord's church and we just LOVE the brethren there...it's small, but so intimate and such fine Christian people:) My sister teaches at the small school there in town-SO cute-very old, but indeed a wonderful community for her to be raising her girls! Then there is Arrow Rock-a national historic town-just less than 10 miles away. They have a Lyceum theatre-just a sweet old country chapel that has been restored and hosts about 15 live broadway shows every year-I'd LOVE to have season tickets:) Until my sister moved to Blackwater, John and I had NO idea where we might want to retire! We loved living overseas, but knew that was impractical because of the expense. We have only lived in Arkansas and North Carolina here in the U.S. during this AF journey. We thought perhaps AR was the place for us to retire, probably because it was "comfortable/familiar". We've since discovered it will require too much of the things we want to "rid" ourselves of to remain here. North Carolina has some amazing sights-but we don't really have any real "draws" there either. I was so excited when my sister moved to Blackwater and I went to visit-it was the first place that really "spoke" to me! I knew John would LOVE it-amazing outdoor activities and rural country living-he's always wanted that. We only had the opportunity for that when we lived in England on the farm. It was SUCH a blessing-I'm glad to have had that blessing because it gave me a different perspective. I am a person that gets their "energy", zeal for life from "people". But, what I discovered in England was that I also love being away from the hustle/bustle, having much alone time with God, and a much slower pace of life. It's like God has planted stepping stones for me to discover things about myself all along and has led me to a dream that is closer to John's. Of course we both love the idea of being with my sister and her family. Watching my nieces grow up, just experiencing every day life with them-going to ballgames, school musical productions, etc...It'll be like watching them experience the same life we have-just 15 years later:) We can "relate" to my sister/her family-we too, have lived away from physical family most of our adult lives. They are just beginning their journey as ours is ending. It will give us opportunity to be "pseudo" grandparents until our own grandchildren arrive some day. John/I both have realized that it's important not to make ANY move strictly based on family, the definition of "family" changes every year as those we love die, new ones are born, etc... We truly believe that Blackwater is a community we could truly enjoy living in and finally die in some day-even if my sister's family were not there. Through my sister-God has introduced us to a place that our hearts are now in love with-a place where we can grow old together, enjoy life together, just "be" together. Of course having a sister that is a "star" teacher at the small community school sure will help us get "started" there. My sister and I are a lot alike in some very significant ways-we both never meet a stranger, so she already has made some very deep connections in the community. I talked with her about the possibility of John/I substituing as custodians, cooks, groundskeepers, etc... at the school for extra play money when we get a hankering to take a trip somewhere special that may require a bit more funds-she says that should not be an issue AT ALL! In the meantime, we'll just live in the community-enjoy everyday simple living and take a weekly jaunt into the "city" for our groceries/special outings. I feel so extremely blessed-I have had such a wonderful life along this military journey. Until the last year or so, I was very "hesitant" about what our future might hold. Change can be difficult-though you would think having lived this life I'd be accustomed to change. I suppose I am-but this change will be a "permanent" one. With the military-no matter where we were/what we were doing, it has only been "temporary"-it was coming to an end. The idea of living in the SAME place from late 40's til death was a daunting one for us! Now, I have a sense of "peace" and "belonging"-as well as a longing for the next 4 years to pass quickly so we can move into this next adventure in our lives together.
This last month has also been a time of rediscovery for me, personally. I began this year knowing that I would be going to a spiritual retreat that would challenge me to consider a "word" to focus on this year. Being an introspective person and a person that doesn't take things like that lightly, I did some serious thinking on the matter before I came to my word "health". Last night and today, I had a couple of "aha" moments with regards toward my focus word. I have experienced short "glimpses" of this type of authentic "health" moment in my life before. Once after Rebecca was born when I focused on my health. I went through 2 years of infertility and gained 100 pounds during that time from depression. I am not one to take a vow or make a promise flippantly-not to anyone, most especially God. During the time I was seeing a fertility specialist-I vowed to God that if I was able to conceive/deliver a healthy child-I would return to a healthier state so that I would be better equipped for a future pregnancy. I followed through with that vow-I walked/even jogged some and really ate very healthy-I was in the best shape I'd been in since H.S. Then we moved to Germany, I got pregnant a second time and for a year after delivery experienced post partum depression:( Again, I reverted to "food" for comfort in my depression. Thankfully I saw a Dr. that recommended that I "exercise" to release natural healthy mood enhancers-I was willing to try ANYTHING because I hated the depression. That time I became "obsessed" with exercise, 6 days week/2X per day-it was like a drug for me because I hated the depresssion SO much and I felt SO good when I was exercising! Since that time (that was 1998) I slowly have regained the weight. This time not from depression, just lack of activity and age I suppose! When we moved from Germany to the U.S. in 1999-that change took away my "gym" obsession. I was settling into yet another location, different stage of life, different responsibilities w/kids, etc... I've "walked" some with friends over the years since that time. I've always enjoyed that-gives us time to visit while getting some exercise. Moving from England back to U.S. took me away from my walking partner, Lori. Arriving back here gave me opportunity to walk again w/my friend Jen. Now Jen lives about 15 min. away-so it's not convenient AT ALL for us to get together to walk the way it was when I first arrived back here in Arkansas and she lived 2 miles down the road. This brings me to today. My daughter, Rebecca, is a Sr. in H.S. Rebecca is on a journey to college which she hopes leads to a license in dietitics and nutrition. It is a choice that has not surprised me! So much of her life she's had the experience of seeing "first hand" what lack of activity can do to a person's body-not just mine, but most of her extended family members as well. She experienced losing a g'mother at age 7 due to complications from gastric bypass surgery. She shares her concern for her g'pas health often-she sees that his poor health has given him low quality of life. On the other hand-she sees her own father that has exercised faithfully her entire life-he has done this because his career depended on it and he has taken the responsibility to provide for his family very seriously. Rebecca wants a better quality of life for herself without the extra burden of poor health. Rebecca's career choice seems to be a very "authentic" place for her to start changing the cycles of inactivity she's witnessed in those she loves. I am proud of her-she will excel in that career because it "means something" to her! She motivates me to want to be "healthier" again. She encouraged me by saying, "let's go to the gym together", this has lead to a gym membership here in town for all 3 of the girls in our house! The best part about all of this is that I can say that "authentically", I truly enjoy exercise. It's just a "change" that has been difficult to implement-but now that the adjustment period is over-it is providing so many blessings. Even though it exhausts me, I absolutely feel ENERGIZED by the activity/people at the gym...particularly the classes. I went to a power pump class (weight training) this a.m., WOW-it was an hour long, but I already feel stronger. Of course, time with both of my girls-exercising together-PRICELESS! Last night I was at a party (before going to the gym) and a friend remarked "how good I was looking"-that is honestly just a side benefit for me. The weight coming off slowly, my appearance changing, those are not the goal for me-indeed I just want to be healthy again. I want to be able to hike, golf, do all of the things with my husband that he enjoys doing when he retires:) I want to be able to sled with my nieces in that 2' of mid-Missouri snow every year! I want to live my life "fully" as God intended-part of that involves taking care of this temple that my spirit is housed in and where God's Spirit resides daily. I don't ever want to take my health for granted-the ability to walk, the ability to bike, etc...all of those things that are so easy to just dismiss. I'm praying for strength as I continue on this road to better health. It is a long road-it can be difficult because it's easy to slide back into unhealthy patterns. I will be true to my authentic self and be the person God has called me to be...a person of health that is learning/making strides every day.
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Knowing What You Love
As I was cruising through fb this a.m., I came across a new posting by my friend/sister in Christ, Audrianna. Saw that she had started a blog for herself and thought, "how cool". I hope she finds as much enjoyment from it as I've had. I know it's been a while since I blogged, but things get a little crazy sometimes. Not a bad crazy-just busy crazy. I was working hard all last week to help my God chick, Dana, prepare for the weekend spiritual retreat at her cabin in NW Arkansas. The weekend could NOT have exceeded my expectations more! I spent 2 weeks prior to this retreat praying that God would keep the winter weather at bay so that no one would be hindered from coming that really desired/needed to be there. WOW-talk about an answered prayer! Made me think of the passage that says, "He that is able to give exceedingly, abundantly, above all that we ask." AMEN! The weather was absolutely amazing-in the upper 60's low 70's and we had the blessing of being in one of the most beautiful places in the ozarks here in Arkansas! Looking at all of the fb posts and certainly stepping out my front door today helps solidify that God indeed "exceeded" my expectations for the simple prayer that I prayed! It is FRIGIDLY cold here today and my sister in living in a winter wonderland of 19" of snow just 7 hrs. north from here in Missouri! Amazing the difference a day (or should I say a "prayer") can make!
This brings me to the title of today's post. When I first began this blog, I said I would try to give a brief synopsis of the inspirational thought for the day from my "simple abundance" book from which my blog is entitled. Today, I don't have the time to catch everyone up from Jan 25 til now-but I did think it important to share today's thought. It is an important one-the idea of challenging us to "know what we love".
Feb 2-"After decades of letting other people influence us-the media, the magazines, our mothers, friends-you'll have to go cold turkey to find out what it is that you really love. Plan a creative excursion and go brose a home furnishings/decorative accessories shop. Go somewhere you've never been before. What calls to you, excites you? You'll know what you love the moment you see it-you will have a WOW reaction! Next week, go brose a new clothing boutique. Even if the place is "too" expensive, just see what it is that intriques you. Do you always wear jeans because they are more "practical", or could perhaps choosing something that makes you feel gorgeous sometimes should outweigh practicality! Remember, this is the year to ask yourself the questions.What is it that you truly love?"
This brings me to the title of today's post. When I first began this blog, I said I would try to give a brief synopsis of the inspirational thought for the day from my "simple abundance" book from which my blog is entitled. Today, I don't have the time to catch everyone up from Jan 25 til now-but I did think it important to share today's thought. It is an important one-the idea of challenging us to "know what we love".
Feb 2-"After decades of letting other people influence us-the media, the magazines, our mothers, friends-you'll have to go cold turkey to find out what it is that you really love. Plan a creative excursion and go brose a home furnishings/decorative accessories shop. Go somewhere you've never been before. What calls to you, excites you? You'll know what you love the moment you see it-you will have a WOW reaction! Next week, go brose a new clothing boutique. Even if the place is "too" expensive, just see what it is that intriques you. Do you always wear jeans because they are more "practical", or could perhaps choosing something that makes you feel gorgeous sometimes should outweigh practicality! Remember, this is the year to ask yourself the questions.What is it that you truly love?"
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